The entry below was taken from my old journal, written last 02 May 2004:

Let me start this off first by saying that I rarely remember my dreams..and when I do, they're barely realistic.

A few weeks ago, right before A and I had a big fight, I had a dream. I don't really remember how it started. All I remember was this:

A suddenly dropped to one knee and popped the question: Would you marry me? I couldn't believe it! I was so happy that my eyes started watering and all I could see was a blurry image of A. I started laughing. Trying not to choke on my tears and laughter. I was sooo elated. In between my tears and my giggles, I was able to muster a "yes.." A was so happy that he didn't know whether to put the engagement ring on my finger or to pump his arm into the air with a hearty "YES!" first.

A few days later, the dream was some what continued. I dreamt that the next day after A proposed, we got married at Santuario de San Antonio in Forbes. I couldn't really see the details of my dress (shucks! it would have been my dream wedding dress! pun intended!). I knew it was my wedding but I was watching it from afar...from above. Right after the wedding, we went straight to the honeymoon. No reception whatsoever. The weird thing is, my entire family went with us! And I mean including my aunts and uncles and grandparents. Our honeymoon was set in a island which was a cross between Boracay and Hidden Valley Springs. It had the shores, water and sands of Boracay and the back of the island had the forest and hidden falls of Hidden Valley. The weird thing is that just when A and I were about to do "it", we were both stripped down to our undies, my aunt and 2 uncles walk in on us. Of course, we tried to cover ourselves and nonchalantly act like it was nothing. My aunt and uncles came in like they didn't even see anything! My aunt went up to me and said, "here's the medicine you guys were asking for earlier. I only have paracetamol." A was so embarrassed that he had to go out and smoke. After my relatives left, I waited for A to come back. But when he didn't, I went out to search for him. It started to rain outside and since our room was in the middle of the forest, it was gloomy and dark. I was going to the different parts of the resort looking for him until I stumbled upon a recreational room where you could borrow books. I stopped looking for him for awhile and browsed through the books and found a book I wanted to read... and then I woke up. Where are my priorities there? Books over A??? Hel-lo!

A few weeks later, I had another dream. I had a black puppy cradled in my arms and I remember having so much love and affection for it. The puppy got sick and later on in the dream, the puppy turned into a cute, cuddly baby! (Now this is normal for me... weird, unrealistic dreams) And just like the puppy, I loved it just the same. I was happy to have that baby.

A few nights ago, I had another dream. The last in this sequence (so far). I dreamt that I was pregnant and that I gave birth to a baby. I'm not so sure if it was a boy or girl. I don't remember giving birth. I was just pregnant one second and had a baby in my arms the next second. I felt so motherly. I adored the baby and loved it to bits. I was happy.

I wonder what this all means?

Just last Saturday, I had another dream. This time, it was the day before my wedding and I was so excited getting ready for the first day that A and I will be sharing one last name (though I always kid him that when we get married, he's the one who has to change his last name and adopt mine, not the customary way where the girl uses the guy's last name). I don't remember much except that I was very sure it was A I was marrying. I even remember seeing my wedding dress but I didn't focus on the design (Damnit! There goes my chance to see my dream wedding dress!). I do remember I was standing at the end of a long corridor with sunlight pouring behind me and I was fixing the skirt of my gown. It just looked so... so... dream-like! (Doi!) I looked so ethereal.

Again, the question: What does this all means?

Are these premonitions?
Does it mean that I'm ready to settle down?
Does it mean that I have finally found the one for me?
And if you stick to the saying that "Dreams mirror the opposite of reality," does it mean that, gasp! horrors of horrors! I'm not marrying A?

My biological mother who is into tarot readings, astrological interpretations and the like once told me that usually your emotions in your dreams reflect your emotions in real life. I'm relieved that in all dreams I was happy that I was marrying A. :p

Because I was curious of the hidden meaning in my dreams, I decided to check the dream dictionary . Here are the meanings based on the symbols in the dream:

Wedding- To dream of a wedding is a sign of a death and a funeral (Oh, Good God, NO!!!). There are various other meanings, but this one has always been the cardinal rule for weddings as they symbolize new beginnings, but only at the cost of the death of the former 'life'. This death could mean various types of endings, not necessarily that of the body. (I definitely hope so. I don't want anybody just dying yet).

Book-If books were the main theme of your dream the situation in your life is stable and you will make slow, steady progress to the top of your chosen profession. look to the other symbols in your dream to tell you in what context you should place the book, or books, in relation to your own life situation, bear in mind that the action associated with books is progress. Well, dreams were not really the center of my 'honeymoon' dream but I did stop looking for A for awhile because I saw books I haven't read in awhile. So if it means that in real life, I chose career over my love life? I guess in a way, it is true. There are times that I put my work first before A but thankfully, he understands. After all, he does the same thing too! It's all good.

Puppy/ Dog-A dream of dogs is usually a fairly good omen. A dog barking happily shows that you will have a pleasing social life. A friendly, happy dog shows that you have lots of good friends.

Baby-A clean baby speaks of a wonderful love affair or even the making of many new friends. A nursing baby can mean contentment or even deception when taken in relation to other symbols in your dream. Dreaming of a baby can also denote the state of your soul life, again in relation to the other signs.

Pregnancy-If the dreamer is a woman and you dream you are pregnant then you will see a big increase in your income. Hey, hey, hey! This, I like. Show me the money!!!

Light-(the light I'm pertaining here is that of the sunlight streaming behind me while I was fixing the skirt of my wedding dress) A light shining out of the dark, or a flashlight beam, shows that you will finally find the truth in a situation or the answer to a personal problem that you have been searching for.

Hmmm, with all these meanings, I'd say, not bad at all. I just hope I don't dream of a wedding again! Yikes